Emotional Intelligence
LOA Principles are a Perfect Fit

Welcome to my nutshell version of Emotional Intelligence, EI, for the woman who wants to go from average, to successful to excellent.

These skills helped me along my career path, from registered nurse, to college professor to manager, to hospital CEO and nursing home administrator to successful independent business owner. EI is all about how people and relationships function, and it really, really matters.

Here are my top 5 reasons why:

1. The higher your Emotional Intelligence, the better your relationships colleagues, supervisors and staff, clients, stakeholders, suppliers and even competitors will be.

2. You and your organization benefit from your increased EI.

3. The better your communication skills get, the higher your EI.

4. There is a direct correlation between a woman’s EI and her success in leadership and business.

5. As your EI climbs, you feel more motivated, are more productive and attract more and more people and enjoyable circumstances to yourself.

Note that EQ, for Emotional Quotient, a take on IQ, is a term often used interchangeably. Also note that Daniel Goleman (1) is often credited with the Emotional Intelligence idea… that intelligence, as measured in IQ tests, is only one quality we need for success in life. He identified EI as a critical element dimension of our makeup, theorizing we require it for productive work and a successful life.

Emotional Intelligence is:

• our ability to recognize emotions and emotional states in ourselves and others

• our ability to name them

• our skill at controlling our own emotions appropriately

• our skill at intervening with others, once we recognize their emotional state. Examples are: calming or redirecting them in effective ways.

• being aware of our emotions and their relative power over us, and not allowing them to take control. (I think our parents called this maturity. )

For the woman aspiring to a leadership position (or just looking for workplace wellness) EI is one of the important soft skills I believe is critically important to learn and master. The fun part is, while intelligence is usually considered innate (debatable), it has been shown that women have much control over their EI strengths or weaknesses. I venture the opinion that we are generally naturally better at this than men.

LOA strategies can help you increase your Emotional Intelligence

Interested in EI self-improvement? A commitment to a few changes will make a significant difference if you are lacking in this area. Though this is only a bird’s eye view, the following strategies will get you started.

1. (Same as LOA Contrast list) Take Stock of What You Do Not Want / Who You do Not Want to Be.

Reflect on past incidents where your emotional reactions played a role in a creating a negative outcome in a work situation. Try to remember it clearly and matter of fact-ly.

Next, try out 2 alternative responses you could have had. Examples: a more mature way of responding to a boring meeting presentation, or a more rational, calm reaction to being asked to work overtime on Friday night. Any wiser way of dealing with conflicts and not-so-great incidents of life are what you consciously focus on, including visualizing these.

2. (Same as Attract It Energizing step) Use Strategy 1, above, (also called Reflective analysis), and + practice some imaging of the better, alternative scenarios. In other words, visualize them. Very Law of Attraction, is it not? Practice these on a regular basis, slowly start incorporating the ideas in your work place interactions and watch your emotional intelligence climb. Ask your boss if she is noticing it.

Emotional Intelligence: Learn It. Do It. Attract better experiences.

Have you ever responded to an event at work with a disproportional emotional reaction? Getting better at EI will help you be aware of emotions as they pop up, and allow you to take control. Great leaders do this. Successful moms do it. Star athletes do it.

Once you have mastered strategy 1 and 2 above, you will begin to recognize that some co-workers' behaviours “push your buttons”. They have a knack for triggering a particular emotional reaction in you. With better skills at EQ, you can choose whether or not to “push back” and even better, how to respond in a positive, intelligent manner.

Tip for Human Resources Professionals in the Womans World / Workplace Sector. A seminar on Emotional Intelligence would be a popular offering in any workplace training or staff education day. Having taught over 1,000 nursing students, and managed or led several largely female workforces, I can safely share that women learn, and are more open to change, when there is emotional logic, and personal life improvement potential attached to the subject matter / issue.

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